by Barbara Fagan-Smith
Often, our home life and family life gets the short end of the stick. After a long day at work, we get home with little energy to devote to our loved ones and our own dreams, individually and together. Here is a way to give your family the type of quality attention that we often only give to work or outside volunteer and community efforts. Regardless of what your family looks like or believes in, you will be able to strengthen your family using the following framework and tips:
1. Communication
Communicate. Learn some basic skills in how to communicate with compassion. Schedule times to talk together as a family, to share ideas, dreams and challenges. Make sure you take the time to listen to each other, spend fun time together and connect.
(Communication: Speaking with honesty, listening with empathy, connecting, sharing and making plans together)
2. Values
Define your values as a family. What’s most important to each family member and to your family collectively? Identify and list your values.
(Values: A set of agreed upon principles, qualities and beliefs that guide our decisions and actions as a family)
3. Agreements
Talk about how you want to agree to behave in your family.
(Agreements: A living set of guidelines that we, as a family, agree to follow)
4. Traditions
Talk about your traditions as a family. Name them. Are there any you want to discontinue? Are there new ones you’d like to adopt?
(Traditions: Chosen practices that create a sense of belonging, connection and structure that help hold our family together.)
5. Identity
Create a family logo or crest that expresses who you are as a family. Is there also a song, a poem, a certain food or style that represents your family?
(Identify: Our character and personality as a family)
6. Purpose
Define your purpose as a family. How can you make a difference together?
(Purpose: A statement that expresses what we hope to achieve together as a family)
7. Vision
Create a picture of your future. Imagine that it’s a year from now, or three years from now: what will your life look like ideally? Share your dreams with each other.
(Vision: A clear and compelling description of our family’s future)
8. Operations
Evaluate how your day-to-day life runs as a family. Recognize all of the many tasks that are required on a daily, weekly, monthly and annual basis. Are there any areas that need attention? How can you improve those areas?
(Operations: How we manage day-to-day tasks)
9. Contributions
Identify who is responsible for which of the many tasks we need to complete as a family. Talk about how everyone can pitch in.
(Contributions: Working together to keep our family running smoothly)
10. Appreciation
Take turns on paper or talking out loud to let each member of the family know what you appreciate about them.
(Appreciation: Recognizing each family member and expressing gratitude)

These concepts are further discussed in “The Family ROI Experience: A Step-by-Step Guide to Realizing Your Best Family,” now available on Amazon.
The Family ROI Experience: A Step-by-Step Guide to Realizing Your Best Family. This book, and the Family ROI Experience within it, is a non-profit venture with the goal of helping families around the world grow stronger. I have used this program to strengthen my own family, and have spent years of donated time and resources creating this exciting program, along with a talented team, to pass on to others.
The New Zealand Government’s Families Commission has also embraced the Family ROI Experience program, and is using it with families across the country now.
I believe that families, in all their shapes and sizes, are the foundation of every community. Ideally, our families provide a safe harbor for each individual to develop, grow and ultimately contribute to society. If our families are strong, our communities are strong and the world will be a better place. That is our vision.
The Family ROI Experience is designed to provide structure and focus to the intentional development of families. We draw from best practices used in organizations and apply them with a family friendly touch. The feedback from families who have experienced this program is tremendously positive.
Wishing you a wonderful family life!!
Barbara